The Magazine of The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America


Missing the squirrels

Preschooler disappointed by skipping museum exhibit

Our son and daughter-in-law planned a full Saturday of activities for their three children but ran out of time to include a visit to the Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit. When reviewing the day with their 4-year-old twins, Henry sat up in bed and said, "But Mom, we didn't get to see the Dead Sea squirrels!"

Patricia Sween
Red Wing, Minn.

Heal him!

"I'm not sure what an epistle is. I think it's some sort of pre-email device."
I received this e-mail but decided it must be missing the word not: "Michael came home sick from school today so I'm sending him to religion tonight." Such dedication to confirmation.

Andrew D. Moscinski
Appleton, Wis.

Making change

We were taking the offering at our men's group. All I had was a $20 bill, so I put it in the hat and took change. My pastor noticed what I was doing. He leaned over and whispered, "I hope you don't do this on Sunday mornings ...."

David Ehler
La Grange, Texas

"Where did you get this nursery pager? Little red lights are running around in a circle and it says, 'Your table is ready.' "
Pre-communion stampede

I asked about 20 nursing home residents who had gathered if they wanted to commune. They all said yes, so I began the invocation. But I was interrupted by shouting: "You mean this is church? I don't want to stay for church!" The man in a wheelchair moved as fast as he could out of the room. This started a near-stampede as others joined the fray, all complaining about how they weren't going to stay either. When one resident asked if I could help push him out, I reluctantly agreed, but got a scolding from another who said, "He's supposed to do that on his own. He's supposed to be exercising." About 10 remained for communion and a wonderful conversation.

Sara Quigley
Albia, Iowa

Pack a lunch will ya?

Years ago, I was teaching preschoolers in our small, rural Sunday school about God providing manna to the Israelites during their 40-year exile. A boy from a typical farm family seemed rather unsympathetic when he said, "Well, if they knew they were going to be gone so long, why didn't they pack a lunch?"

Carol Berg
Zahl, N.D.


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February issue


Embracing diversity