iab-728x90

The Magazine of The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America

iab-728x90

Fasten your seat belt, Jesus

I told my granddaughter and passenger, Kari, 3, that Jesus lives in heaven but is also right beside us in the car. Then I heard her say, “Jesus! Seat belt!”

Gerry Fosen
Phoenix, Ariz.

Jesus, inside and out
“This Sunday’s offering included cash,
“This Sunday’s offering included cash, checks and four gift cards.”


My daughter said she was scared of the dark and needed someone to sleep with her. Her brother said, “You don’t need to be scared. Jesus is with you. He lives in your heart.” Her response? “I know that. But he lives inside of me and that doesn’t count. I need someone outside myself!”


Jussara Hagen
Cedar Rapids, Iowa

Feast day?

On a Super Bowl Sunday at Bethlehem Lutheran Church, Encinitas, Calif., our pastor asked the children what was special about that day. One child bravely spoke up: “It’s the holiday of football!”

Skye Svenningsen
Encinitas, Calif.

Questionable breath

When I put my daughter, Rebekah, to bed I snuggled closely to her, my head sharing her pillow. Then I prayed, “Dear Jesus, bless Mommy and Daddy, Grandpa and Grandma, Tim, Joel and Susan ....” When I said “Amen,” Rebekah let out a long sigh and said, “Daddy, I held my breath while you prayed so I wouldn’t have to smell yours.”

Arley F. Fadness
Custer, S.D.

One way to tell your church is getting
One way to tell your church is getting too big.
1, 2, holding for 3

One day when my great-niece, Banks, was doing something she shouldn’t have been doing, her mother, Gardner, started counting to three. As Gardner was counting, Banks put both hands on her cheeks and said, “I wish God hadn’t made three.”

Teresa Walter
Hickory, N.C.

Good hope

It was a few minutes before the early service at our congregation when we heard a clear but small voice behind us saying, “But I don’t want to stay here” and then “But I don’t want to stay here.” Without turning in his seat, a worshiper deadpanned, “I hope that’s not the pastor.”


Luther Stauffer
New Port Richey, Fla.

Jesus manager?

I helped direct a children’s Christmas pageant at Lord of Life Lutheran Church, West Chester, Ohio. In the program, I listed several thank-yous, including this one that I caught before printing: “I’d like to thank my dad for providing a manager for baby Jesus.”

Traci Anthony
Hamilton, Ohio


Comments



Print subscribers and supporting Web members may comment.

Log in or Subscribe to comment.

text size:

this page: email | print

iab-728x90
October issue

OCTOBER issue:

Older adults: Assets to our church

More...