The Magazine of The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America


Ways to support the pastor's spouse

• Use confidential e-mail or answering machines to communicate when the pastor is unavailable. Don’t expect the spouse to relay information.

• Be sensitive to the busy lives most parents today experience around their children’s schedules and career requirements.

• Recognize the pastor’s need for personal time—time away from church on days off and vacations.

• Anticipate and offer assistance when there’s extra stress on a pastor’s family, such as Christmas and Easter, or if there’s an ill parent or child.

• Schedule meetings that allowfor uninterrupted family mealtime together.

• Offer to baby-sit so the pastor and his or her spouse can go on a date.

• Recognize the different stages of life that a spouse might go through: caring for children, working full or part time, caring for elderly parents or other volunteer commitments.

• Give the pastor a reasonable living wage and benefits.

• Understand that the pastor’s spouse may have his or her own opinions regarding Scripture and theology—the same as any other member.


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