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The Magazine of The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America

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How singles can help themselves

• If you feel isolated, take a deep breath and try to separate the feelings and hurt you're taking on from what is really happening. Chances are, no one is really trying to ostracize you. Don't ostracize yourself.

• You can't expect others to use politically correct language at all times. Changing how we talk to each other takes time. Remember the flap over "Ms."? Instead, try to develop a tougher skin. So what if the invitation says "bring your mom and dad to Parents' Day"? You're a parent--go alone.

Help your child fit in by acting like you fit in. Assume that you and the kids make a perfectly legitimate family, all by yourselves, and your children will follow your lead.

When two parents are appropriate, like at a confirmation ceremony or wedding, graciously invite your ex (or accept the invitation politely). Be there together for your child, and don't argue, fight, grimace or snipe.

Help teachers, pastors, physicians and others over the bumpy parts--about how you want to be addressed, how you want to be treated and how you want to be included.



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August issue

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