It's difficult to remember what life was like before I was sick. I recall that once I had enormous energy and was hardly ever ill. My personal and professional life was satisfying and full of hope. But 23 years ago everything changed. After a wonderful evening with my wife, I woke in the middle of the night with excruciating abdominal pain. We rushed to the hospital where tests and examinations revealed an acute small bowel blockage. A tube was inserted through my nose into my stomach--an inhumane procedure. But this gave no relief. Surgery was completed early that morning. I was told I had Crohn's disease. I felt relieved, at least there was no cancer, no terminal disease. "Just a chronic illness," my surgeon said. Now--after three more major surgeries and a dozen or so hospitalizations--I know what that means. My daily ritual involves multiple medications. Each new flare-up is unpredictable. I no longer trust my body. It operates on its agenda quite apart from my wishes.
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