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The Magazine of The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America

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Standing with the bride & groom

I walked into the church office Monday morning after officiating for a weekend wedding at Christ the King Lutheran, Haltom City, Texas, and the secretary apologized for an error in the wedding bulletin. She had forgotten to put in when the congregation was to be seated. I was so focused on the bride and groom that I didn't realize the congregation stood throughout the entire ceremony.

Chuck Pegg
Justin, Texas

"Through best-case scenarios and through worst-case scenarios ...."

Assembly travel

I was planning the route my pastor and I would take to the synod assembly some miles away. I emailed my plans and asked if she had a better way. She wrote back, "Jesus is the way." I replied, "Is he driving?"

Carolyn Wemple
Berkley, Mich.

Beware the Aug. 14 Gospel text

During worship at St. Timothy Lutheran, San Jose, Calif., a little girl started screaming at the back of the church. At the same time, the pastor was reading Matthew 15:23: "Send her away, for she keeps shouting after us ...."

Phyllis Makie
San Jose, Calif.

dik lapineSurfer Jesus

In his children's sermon the pastor asked, "What job do you think Jesus would want to do?" He expected they might say "carpenter" or "fisherman" and was surprised when one girl suggested "surfer." Asked to explain, she said, "Well, he walked on water, didn't he?"

John Freed
West Bloomfield, Mich.

Bulletin bloopers

From First United Lutheran Church, Dallas: "You may leave quietly or be seated for private medication during the postlude."

From St. Paul Lutheran Church, Morgantown, W.Va.: "Choir anthem: 'Lay Up Your Treasurers in Heaven.'"

From the Monthly Spire, Our Savior Lutheran Church, Stanley, Wis.: "The senior choir invites any member who enjoys sinning to join the choir."

From a Southwestern Pennsylvania Synod worship bulletin: "Note: Glutton-free hosts are available at the far right communion station."


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